Today is another landmark day. Three years ago today, after yet another sleepless night with the weight of too many thoughts crowding my post diagnosis headspace, I took the plunge. I had already been blogging as Feisty Blue Gecko for a couple of years, but needed a new online space for the new real space I had stepped into. And this gecko-flavoured breast cancer blog was duly hatched.
Last year, on my second blogaversary, I wrote a long post with some background detail, and characters which have evolved as the blog has taken on a life of its own. It is quite a blogossary.
This morning, I took a big step back in time, and visited that very first post when I dipped my toes into the blogospheric waters. And this is how I saw things then, on 28 October 2009:
This really is a record of the unexpected. I don’t know where it is going, and I don’t know how it will look, but life changed 3 weeks ago and I have a lot to get off my chest. Quite literally.
And the purpose of this? To help me process and deal with what has and is happening. To share one experience of what is a very common disease. To tell my story as it unfolds, in a way that helps me. And the rest…………….
This is the biggest and scariest challenge of my life. Breast cancer is unknown in our family and I have not really been close to anyone while they have been fighting cancer. But I have such a lot going for me, this is not going to be a tale (tail) of woe, (well maybe sometimes), but a rise to the challenge. I have such amazing support – I am not in this alone. I also know that much of this will be revealing and personal, but I have been encouraged by the number of other blogs by women with breast cancer so I think I’m entitled to have a shout too! We are all different and I know my perspective will be different.
This part of the story starts on September 23 so there is a bit of catching up to do. I will try and fill in the details and bring things up to date but it will take a bit of time. This is partly because so much has happened, and partly because I am feeling the grand theft of many lymph nodes from under my left arm which makes typing slow and full of mistakes. And partly because there is so much going on in my head which, as I said above – I need to get off my chest!
28 October 2009
I could never have imagined how important the blog would become in my life, and how many incredible people I have connected with, the friendships I have formed and the lorryloads I have learned.
And here I am, after three years. Still writing. Still ranting and venting. Still reflecting. Still making friendships and connections. Still processing and deliberating. And still getting a great deal off my chest!
So this is one to celebrate. I even Googled “gecko cake” because it is much sweeter than Googling “is-this-funny-mark-a-sign-of-cancer?”
And guess what? There are heaps and heaps of images of gecko cakes! And not only gecko cakes, but even a gecko shaped cake cutter! Who would have imagined that?
So, thank you dear gecko and dear blog. Here’s to many returns of the day, and many more years of irreverence and feistiness together!